Saturday, 30 April 2005
Hmmm what to say what to say...
I have yet to ask the question.... EEEEEK
Not feeling so good...
Last night was fun
Yay Top Gun!
Write more later.... my life is boring at the moment... cept whilst I talk to Tanys on the phone! Horray for that not being boring! =)
Thursday, 28 April 2005
Ow...
Alrighty, before I go onto the point behind this particular blog... I would like to re-cap last nights events.
So.. the fire alarm went off and we all had to evacuate the building for about 20 minutes so I went outside and chilled with Janine and Aaron. Then we were allowed back inside and the service was pretty good.
I saw a bunch of people I hadn't in a while... had a great talk with lots of em. Jordan eventually showed up.. played Desperado on the piano for Kayla Greg and I, Greg apologized for beaking me hahahaha that's funny... then tried to convince Greg and Jordan to come out with us but they just booked it out of there lol. Sheesh. So they took off to spend 'bonding' time... bonding eh... considering I could have sworn I saw Greg take off the opposite direction. LoL. Oh well. Then to Tim's, saw Dusty for the first time in like... ever! and then Lindsay came and we chilled.. I came home and did some homework. The End!
~~~
Now... onto the reflective reasoning behind this blog.
You all know I'm one for putting things into God's hands and letting him deal with it right? Well sometimes I just want to leap out and take control... haha I am a control freak sometimes after all... cuz I mean based on the track record... I've messed up a few times. I hope you know what your doing God lol make sure your planning for Jamie Shail! LoL.
Life is great. I don't think life could get any sweeter! <3
Wednesday, 27 April 2005
Such a great day holy crap.
Got accepted to the Vet clinic once again... oh frick I'm so psyched!!!!!!!!!!
Blaze was great... saw a ton of people!
Cept the bite is starting to sting a little bit... eek ^.^
The report card:
Bio - 65%
Psych - 84%
Foods - 89%
English - 87%
History - 79%
Overall - 80.8%!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I finally made the honor roll people. For the first time since grade 9! I'm so happy!
Blaze tonight.. Jordan and Greg are playing... HORRAY! I LOVE LIFE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Tuesday, 26 April 2005
Well... just an FYI, I put up the new layout.
I found the picture when I looking at reviews of the ballet I went to with my Mom. I actually really liked the picture... and after I added a river as her skirt, the wings and the forest.. I was thrilled. However because I looked at it for so long I began to see Jenna hahaha good stuff.
So ya.. I like it. My mouth hurts tons... icky!! =S
I'm going to go to bed soon... it's been a long day... and well I wanna have a shower and wash my hair... clean up a bit so..... ya! Happy Wednesday tomorrow!
We'll see what happens when I send the letter in....
I know that she deserves it... now the rest of the world needs to see it too.
Feeling like crap... I can't even open my mouth. Damn stitches.
Sunday, 24 April 2005
You & Me - LifehouseWhat day is it
And in what month
This clock never seemed so alive
I can't keep up
And I can't back down
I've been losing so much time
Cause it's you and me and all of the people
With nothing to do
Nothing to lose
And it's you and me and all of the people
And I don't know why
I can't keep my eyes off of you
All of the things that I want to say
Just aren't coming out right
I'm tripping inwards
You got my head spinning
I don't know where to go from here
Cause it's you and me and all of the people
With nothing to do
Nothing to prove
And it's you and me and all of the people
And I don't know why
I can't keep my eyes off of you
There's something about you now
I can't quite figure out
Everything she does is beautiful
Everything she does is right
Cuz it's you and me and all of the people
With nothing to do
Nothing to lose
And it's you and me and all of the people
And I don't know why
I can't keep my eyes off of you
You and me and all of the people
With nothing to do
Nothing to prove
And it's you and me and all of the people
And I don't know why
I can't keep my eyes off of you
What day is it
And in what month
This clock never seemed so alive...
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I get goosebumps when I hear this song... Oh wow. Hmmm.
This bites starting to sting constantly...
So friday and saturday were great.
Friday:
Went and played mini golf with Kayla and Liz and Lindsay *it was his birthday and all* and then we drove out to the Abramoffs and chilled there for a bit... it was good fun.
Saturday:
I woke up feeling lousy... then I went out with Kayla to drop off the roll of film from Fridays adventures. Then we went over to Tanners for pizza and great food lol cuz it was his birthday... then at about 6:30 I went out with Kaylee *picked me up from Tanners* and went and saw the most amazing musical ever. Little Shop Of Horrors was just UNREAL oh wow!!!!!! Danny and Julia were just amazing, Aeden did a great job as the plant.. oh it was so good! Then I went back to Tanners and in essence lay down listening to Jordan Matt and ... I don't remember the other guys name lol play guitar and sing. Jordan did Desperado and wow was it amazing. All in all it was a good night.
I don't know what I'm doing today... I know I'm not going to church.. I need to get over this cold.. yuckie! Tomorrow I have my surgury thinger... with my mouth... eeeeek.
Anyways I'm going to go eat breakfast so toodles!
Oh and P.S. I got bitten by the bug again... not that bug... the OTHER bug... oh dear... lol
Thursday, 21 April 2005
Three things to say before I go to bed:
- Allergies suck a ton... I never get them! Damn you spring! =S Itchy eyes, snuffed head... yuckie
- I have a new favourite band... they would be called 'Heart'. Crazy On You? Barracuda? Come on now.. you can't beat that!
- The ballet has to be the most elegant, most beautiful thing I have ever seen in my life. 'A Cinderella Story' was just... so magical...
Makes you think about the fairytale we'll all end up getting.... hmmm.
Tuesday, 19 April 2005
I'm so sorry I forgot about you blog... apparently I have a bad habit of being on time.
Happy One Year my dear! (as of yesterday I know lol) Wow... I read through a bunch of my posts... and I started to cry. The year was full of so much; anticipation, heartache, heartbreak, sadness, anger... and just overall general memories. Last year was rough... but I noticed similarities of posts.. I guess things don't change as much as you might think in a year. Maybe the friends, how you feel about them, the crushes.. oh dear the crushes! LoL. It makes me even sadder some of the good things I wrote... How well things could have gone... how udderly bad things went. I remember reading those times when I would just walk under the stars, my heart physically aching from the pain, and the dissapointment of so many situations and people... but the thing that is different is I've grown stronger, much stronger. It makes me think I'm doing things right if I can pull out of situations like the ones I was put in over the last year. GO ME!
So here's to you blog...
HAPPY FIRST YEAR ANNIVERSARY!Okay so onto the more recent events...
I have an 89 in foods, an 84 in psychology and an 80 in history! WOOT! And as far as the angry situation goes... I'm going to be real blunt here like the British... fuck it! They don't decide my future.. I won't see half of em for the rest of my life! So f them! Allies for surely coming out for grad.. so im psyched about that!
Jordan stood me up... fricken kid won't even respond! what is this madness!
BLAZE IS GOING TO BE UNREAL TOMORROW!!!! REDCLOUD, MANIFEST AND NIFTY!! WOOT! =D
I'm going to header lol
Things are looking up... there just a few loose ends I'd love to get tied up hehehehe ;)
Saturday, 16 April 2005
Alright... nothing much has gone on this week.
So here it is.. in point form too!
- I passed my Foodsafe certificate with an 86! Yay!
- The history test got moved to Tuesday (of the coming week)
- Blaze went really well... I'm definatly psyched for it next week!
- My Dad left for England (London) and is there now (7 hour difference!)
- Niki ran away for a little bit.. then we found her in the back alley... wow was I scared!
That's all I can really remember!
Aeden is going to pick me up a ticket for the Little Shop Of Horrors play.. which will be really really good! Tomorrow is Greg Denies concert with Redcloud, Manifest and Nifty, which also shall be very good! I'm off to bed... I watched Lord Of The Flies and Something About Mary tonight with Jason and Chelsie... so I'm tired!!! NIGHT!
Monday, 11 April 2005
Okay.... so yesterday was a wonderful rant... and I feel tons better about it now. Life is grand? Wanna know why? Because I say it is!!! Darn rights!!! I'll make life good from now on... I won't let it work its way up.
So what makes life good?? Well... I have discovered an amazingly great person whom I love dearly lol Awe Tannie you make my life! YAY!
Secondly... ALLIE CALLED ME TODAY AND SHE WANTS TO COME OUT FOR GRAD HOLY FRICKEN A!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
So as you can tell... I'm so excited. So I have to find out details about that one but other then that... holy am I EVER pumped! =D Life is looking up!
Hahaha now all I need is my dress to be finished... hehe and an escort ;) lol
Sunday, 10 April 2005
I Want To Believe --
Sass JordanWhen will I die
When will I marry
Why do I cry for nothing sometimes
Why do I feel like I'm in a hurry
Feels like a race and I'm out of time
Like a lover turning into a friend
Somewhere a heart is getting broken again
How does the whole thing end?
I want to believe in something for real
I want to believe in something I feel
I want to believe it's all that I need
I want to believe
Who will be king and who will be begger?
When will I have this mystery solved?
Who said a ring could mean love forever
Nothin's for sure except growing old
Will I always be here spinning my wheels
Or does misforturne have a hand in the deal
Is that how my fate is sealed?
I want to believe in something for real
I want to believe in something I feel
I want to believe it's all that I need
I want to believe
I want to believe love has a chance to survive
The dream to be as one
I want to believe in a nurturing love
And not just a sacrifice
Where is my home and where am I going?
When will I know and how will I know?
I had a lover who turned into a friend
I had a heart but it got broken again
And I don't know if it ever will mend
Is this how the whole thing ends?
I want to believe in something for real
I want to believe in something I feel
I want to believe it's all that I need
I want to believe
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
No words... no words. It just hurts beyond all reason... These tears welling up against my eyes are not from me... but from the way people are. I can't trust them anymore... which is too bad... because for a while there I thought I might have a stead-fast group of friends for once in my life... apparently I was wrong. All it was filled with was misery and fakeness. I'm sick and tired of dealing with this. I know I'll know a reason later on in life... but that doesn't console me at the moment. It's over and done. No more.... end of story. You can all just live your lives... leave me out of them from now on.
Hmmmm, what to write about this weekend;
Well on Friday was the Jeremy Rigby, Autumn Tides, Whittaker and Heroes For Hire. Not a too shabby show... and as usual Aeden Sol Jordan and I can't remember the guy that filled in for Josh.. but they did really well. Jenna showed up halfway through so I was thrilled cuz I was the only one there =( Then Jenna and I hung out after, went driving through the University to the Syncatron... got lost a few too many times lol and had frosties. Then Saturday I hung out with Kayla after I went shopping for a wonderful article of clothing for grad from a lingerie store. HAHA best day ever. Good fun! Then I chilled with Kayla until that evening when we went to Tim Hortons for supper and met up with Tim and Brandon (his friend). Then we came here... and hung out, then Ryan Derkson came here, then Darrick and Shane, then Alysha and Chris. Then we all went to the Abramoffs, Brandon got a speeding ticket =S we watched videos of them biking, and then we had to leave because Tim was staying in the city. So then after dropped him off (after spending a while trying to find his house) We went out and about trying to find food.. but they wer choosing horrible places to go at 12:00 in the morning! Boston Pizza... shoot. Then we went to A&W, oh wow... hahaha hanging with 3 guys can be certainly entertaining!!! Then I came home and slept! Woot for sleeping! Now.. its pouring rain.. just like it was last night... and thats about it! I'll write more if the day bceause exciting.
Thursday, 7 April 2005
The Rain Song -- Led ZeppelinIt is the springtime of my loving - the second season I am to know
You are the sunlight in my growing - so little warmth I've felt before.
It isn't hard to feel me glowing - I watched the fire that grew so low.
It is the summer of my smiles - flee from me Keepers of the Gloom.
Speak to me only with your eyes. It is to you I give this tune.
Ain't so hard to recognize - These things are clear to all from
time to time.
Talk Talk - I've felt the coldness of my winter
I never thought it would ever go. I cursed the gloom that set upon us...
But I know that I love you so
These are the seasons of emotion and like the winds they rise and fall
This is the wonder of devotion - I see the torch we all must hold.
This is the mystery of the quotient - Upon us all a little rain must fall.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I adore this song... the guitar, the piano, the violins. I definatly get teary-eyed because of this song. My Dad always said this song reminded him of Dixie... and he can't listen to it. Maybe thats why I have a harder time listening. Awe.
It was a relitively good day actually... Tomorrow is an exciting day. Bio test... essay due. Play for the afternoon... Aeden, Jordan, Sol and someone else's show hahaha at Rock Of Ages! Wooot I'm excited! Gotta finish the essay! AHHHH! THEN STUDY!!!
I don't know what to say...
But it's alright I guess... I'm actually alright with things!
Today wasn't too shabby...
Things are looking up for me! =)
Wonder why he called me? lol dork!
Monday, 4 April 2005
Life isn't about keeping score.
It's not about how many friends you have,
Or how accepted you are.
Not about if you have plans this weekend,
Or if you're alone.
It isn't about who you're dating, who you used to date,
How many people you've dated,
Or if you haven't been with anyone at all.
It isn't about who you have kissed,
It's not about sex.
It isn't about who your family is
Or how much money they have
Or what kind of car you drive.
Or where you are sent to school.
It's not about how beautiful or ugly you are.
Or what clothes you wear, what shoes you have on,
Or what kind of music you listen to.
It's not about if your hair is blonde,
Red, black, or brown.
Or if your skin is too light or too dark.
Not about what grades you get, how smart you are,
How smart everybody else thinks you are,
Or how smart standardized tests say you are.
It's not about what clubs you're in
Or how good you are at your sport.
It's not about representing your whole being on a piece
Of paper and seeing who will accept the written you.
Life just isn't those things
Life is about who you love and who you hurt.
It's about who you make happy or unhappy purposefully.
It's about keeping or betraying trust.
It's about friendship, used as a sanctity or a weapon.
It's about what you say and mean,
Maybe hurtful, maybe heartening.
About starting rumors and contributing to petty gossip.
It's about what judgments you pass and why.
And who your judgments are spread to.
It's about who you've ignored
With full control and intention.
It's about jealousy, fear, ignorance, and revenge.
It's about carrying inner hate and love,
Letting it grow, and spreading it.
But most of all, it's about using Your Life to touch
Or poison other people's hearts in such a way
That it could have never occurred alone.
You, and only you,
Choose the way those hearts are affected,
And those choices are what life's all about...
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I really don't know what to say anymore. I guess God just doesn't have it written in the stars for me when it comes to this. How many is this now... honostly... about thirteen or fourteen. I know life isn't fair... but you know, is it so selfish for me to want that one thing I just cannot graps... or should I say cannot withstand with me? Frick... I'm absolutely sick of this... beyond all reason. Maybe I won't go to Blaze this week... we shall see on the mood I'm in... whether or not I feel like enduring a night of it over and over again. Oh well... at least I'm used to the let down... it's happened enough that I could write a screenplay about it.
And not only that... I've got a few other problems bubbling to the surface... cave in the mountain with a walking stick and beard... hermatige here I come...
Alright. Re-cap of the past 5 days! Woot Woot! Nothing to exciting happened on Thursday or Friday... I wasn't feeling that good so I chilled at home, curled up with movies and popcorn. Saturday night I went to battle of the bands with Alysha, Chris, Marlen, Ryan, Liz and Kayla. Good fun... saw a lot of people we knew there. STEREOTRAP was amazing as usual. Then Jordan called me up and I insisted he come over there... which he did cept the tickets were sold out. So we hung out in the upstairs. Then everyone wanted to go to the Abramoffs, but Jordan couldn't, so Liz and I went out for coffee with him. Definatly was fun... apparently Liz has a thing against condoms? HAHA funny. Then on Sunday I stayed home, did some homework, went out with Liz... wow I missed that girl... we really do have a ton in common... and then sleepy time! Now today... sub in Bio... the classes were dull... went to the hospital with Kaylee to visit her Grandma... awe she's just SO cute! I've adopted her lol. Also I saw Mrs. Touet (as in the teacher lol) which was pretty sweet. Oh and lastly.. before I go and do my homework... I'm giving blood tomorrow at 9:30... I'm pretty psyched!
Anyways.. I gotta go do homework cuz I'm going out for coffee with Chelsie at about 8:30 tonight! Woot! =D
